Monday, May 24, 2010

The Nose Knows

As many of you now, I loves me my wine! I try not to love my wine everyday though, as it adds on extra pounds I don't need. Especially when I'm eating chocolate cupcakes every day, because I loves me some sweets! Anyway, I try to keep my wine consumption to the weekends. Sometimes I'll have a glass during the week, if it's been a particularly harrowing day with the kids. This is the last week of school for Sonya, which means she'll be home ALL DAY starting next week. I may have to up my rule to weekends and twice a week. I'll just double my workouts. We'll see.

I usually don't pour myself a glass of wine until after I get the kids in bed. Not because I care about them seeing me drink, but because I'd like to actually enjoy it. Lana is constantly coming up with new ways to push back her bedtime. Sonya and Georgia don't try as many antics, and usually fall asleep quickly. Lana is the worst. I know you all are so surprised about that.

First she has to go to the bathroom, even if she peed 10 minutes before I put her in bed. Then she wants to be covered up again. Then she wants the light on, or the door opened more, or a song to be sung to her. This goes on for a while. In her defense, she does nap during the day and is not that tired when I put them to bed. However, she still needs a nap and I still need her in bed with the rest of them. I've tried ignoring her and not doing what she asks, but it only makes it worse and she only yells more, which keeps the other two awake. So I end up "tucking her in" at least four different times every night. It's more fun than I can tell you.

One night, a few months ago, during one of her procrastination tactics I gave her a kiss and on my way out she said,

"Stop. Come here. Lemme smell yow mouth."

"What?" I asked, not quite sure what she was requesting.

"I wanna smell yow mouth," she said again.

I had heard right. At this point, I had already poured myself a glass of wine and had a few sips. I wasn't sure if this is what she was smelling, but I obliged her and let her smell my breath.

"What dat smell?" She asked.

"Wine?" I asked, not sure this is what she picked up.

"Ooohh, wine," she said back to me. I left the room and didn't hear back from her for the rest of the night.

Now on the nights when I've started to have a glass wine, she immediately knows. I will give her a kiss and she will ask to smell my mouth. Then when she does she gets a big smile on her face and says,


Great. I don't know whether to be proud that I seem to have given birth to the human breathalyzer, or worried that bottles of wine might disappear from my collection in a few years.

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