Monday, January 6, 2014

It's Only a Four Letter Word

Well, how were your holidays?  Ours were fabulous, thanks for asking!  No, I really mean that.  Well, after I got through all the preparation crap of the weeks before, once Christmas hit we had a great time. My parents were here and they are always super helpful, so I didn't do laundry or wake up before 8am all week.  It was awesome!  Thanks mom and dad.  Andy took the week of New Years off, so we were able to hang out and do some fun things as a family, like take the kids to Disney on Ice and complete our Star Wars Trilogy with Return of the Jedi.   Overall it was just what I needed.  What all of us needed.  A couple weeks to do nothing.  No running to school, piano, gymnastics, Girl Scouts, or music class.  I can't say that by Friday we weren't all a little over it, but still it was good for a while.

And what would the holidays be without a funny story?  Of course I wouldn't disappoint.  Although this isn't a holiday story per se, it is something that happened while my parents were here.

We were all sitting around after dinner one night, but Andy was still at work.  My parents and I were chatting and I was texting Andy to see when he would be home.  The girls were starting to get a little rowdy and had gotten up from their seats to play…hmmm…I'm not even sure the name for it.  It's the game where you slap  hands and say a rhyme.  Like "Miss Mary Mac, Mac.  All dressed in black, black, black…"  You remember.  Anyway, they were doing that.  I made Lana and Georgia do one that Lana had learned from one of the girls at school that goes a little something like this:

"Postman, Postman do your duty, here comes the girl with the African booty!"

Yeah.  I know.  I got raised eyebrows from both my parents.  All I could say was "Oh well!  It's what they learned from other kids at school.  Guess every kid doesn't have great parents.  Whaddya gonna do?"

We weren't really paying  much attention to them when they started another one I hadn't heard before.  I wasn't even sure what they were saying and was in the middle of texting Andy when I heard this:

"…then the farm got sick, how many animals got the DICK?! One, Two, Three…." THAT happened.  

To be honest, I'm not even sure that's how it went.  All I know is I heard them say the word Dick.  Loudly.  In front of my parents.

I immediately looked up from my phone wide-eyed over to my mother who had the same horrified/amused expression on her face and she my father and I burst out laughing.  Threw my fits of giggles I asked the girls,

"Wait, wait, wait!  What did you say?"

And both my little girls shouted, "DICK!"  Which only made us laugh harder.

Sonya started to become concerned.  "What? What's wrong?" She asked.  "Is that a bad word?"

"Where did you guys get this one from?"  I just assumed it was another one picked up at school until they proudly told me,


I looked at her and asked her the same question and she said, "I made it up!"  Oh boy.

"Why?  What does dick mean?"  She asked.

"Well…." I said. "It's another word for a man's penis."

"Ohhhhh…" she said and her eyes got wide.  "Oops!"

Meanwhile the little girls are yelling, "Dick, dick, dick!" 

"It's fine." I told them still trying so hard to stop laughing.  "You didn't know. Let's just not sing this one again and certainly not at school ok?  And I know you were trying to rhyme with sick, but let's change it to Mick."

"Okay!" They all replied.

Then I thought about it a minute and asked, "You guys didn't tell this to anyone already at school right?"

They all shook their heads no and I breathed a sigh of relief until Lana said, "No.  I just learned it to my friend Audry."

Wait what?  "You taught this one to your friend, Audry?" I asked.

"Uh-Huh," she replied.

My parents roared with laughter and I just shook my head wondering when I would get the phone call from Audry's parents.

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